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17/7/2021

 I may know what I want to do with my life.

Okay, the thing is, I'm intrigued by engineering. I like the prospect of being able to solve problems on your own while helping civilisation, and I like the modern aspect of it which combines innovative ideas with technology. I, too, like medicine, mainly because the human body, and emotions, are so foreign to me, and I want to explore these. I want to explore the brain. But the routes both of them insist I take... aren't for me? I'm not smart enough for engineering, which is a stupid reason, but I'm not that interested in technology itself. As for medicine, I'm not pleased with the idea that I'm confined to only one path, and only to one place - Malaysia. The long years of studying are tough, but I think what I'll really dislike is not having any time to myself and my job being something that I don't enjoy. I like learning and accumulating my knowledge, but I don't like being of service to others.

Then I found it. MIT.

No, I've always known MIT, and I've always been attracted to that university over the other top universities for the sole fact that they had a community blog. The idea of bonding over each other over a shared school life excited me. But this was different. I went there to read about their engineering block since that may be my course in the future. Then I remembered how they had a neuroscience block, so I went to read on it.

And that was it.

The Department of Brain and Cognitive Sciences. This was where I wanted to be.

Brain science. I wanted to learn brain science.

Okay, I don't really know what else to say because if this were a movie, I'd start rambling over how this I was meant to be with an excited shrill going higher by the second and eyes that sparkle brighter than the blinding sun, but I'm not really a passionate person, so I can't really do that. 

I hinted to my mother what I wanted to do though. But when she asked me what it is I didn't have an answer to give because it was only a few pages I read before I settled with "this is it". So I plan on researching on the program. I debated between writing this here or as an article for Episteme, but Episteme should be held separate from my own personal entities, shouldn't it?

MIT

So MIT, or Massachusetts Institue of Technology, is basically an engineering school. It encourages its students to think of goals outside the box and to solve more complex challenges. They learn about science and technology, but also problem-solving skills and logic. I wish I could talk more about the facilities, but that's not really interesting me at the moment + it's 2 am, so I'll talk about other things that stood out for me other than the details which are all in their website anyway (and the website is HUGE. I feel ashamed of how much time it took me to navigate. Is this what the future feels like?)

They also sort of pride themselves in their environment? They interact with their students, plus the blog, and the classes they learn definitely seem interesting. In a science lecture they had (STS004?) they learned about food. And how food was actually more complex than it seemed. And well, this seems like a place I could thrive in, you know?

They have... a lot of activities too. Sororities, clubs and societies, and cultural groups (though among the list there isn't a South-East Asian association... but that's not a big deal, I don't think about race either). They have huge focus on both arts and sports. And their athletic complex is HUGE. Their dining services are paid for with e-cash.

So if I plan to go here for my undergraduate programs, it would take 4 years, which isn't a big deal. I want to go to the Brain and Cognitive Sciences department, which is under the School of Science. 

First year in MIT goes:
- Choose six core subjects from the typical sciences (Bio, Chem, Physics) and two of eight from humanities and social sciences (HASS subjects. The A doesn't stand for and, by the way, it stands for Art). There are other electives, including becoming part of an undergraduate research center. 
- Join learning communities. They have quite a few
- In first term, grading happens in terms of P (Pass), D, or F (Fail). D and F subjects don't appear on transcripts. Second term, A, B, C, or no record.
- The major isn't chosen until the end of first-year. Your advisor helps in mapping out your elctives with you. (Yes, you get advisors). This is still flexible throughout second year.
- You can take minors or double majors. No more than two minors. I could minor in Computer Science or something (maybe minor in Astronomy or Philosophy too oof-)

One thing said in the MIT applications page was "Tutoring a single child in Maths" makes all the difference. Maybe having a mom who owns a tuition centre isn't too bad after all.

Fuck, I should learn a side language. Japanese seems like the easy option but, hmm. Maybe I should hop onto Korean like my sister.

Shit, it's so expensive. My family might actually die if I don't get that KYUEM scholarship. Now that the seriousness of the situation dawned on me, I know now that I shouldn't be so lax. I wanted to pray, but then I learned you shouldn't pray after 12 midnight.

What I do do which might appeal:
- I get good grades
- I'm willing to study beyond the syllaus (Math, English, CompSci)
- I.. blog.
- I like learning new things
- I am an active participatory on a personality forum (PDB)
- Well-versed in my interests (typology)
- I write essays pretty well
- I can code
- BRO WHAT IF I MAKE AN APP WHICH ASKS YOU WHAT YOU WOULD DO IN A SITUATION TO GET YOUR MBTI TYPE I"M SO SWAG
- Advanced in Math
- Secretary of the prefect board
- I used to swim a lot

Okay so here's what I'll do to appeal, maybe
- Continue Episteme. I should update the system so that I'll be more knowledgeable on fields, eg two weeks per subject.
- Write that damned personality analysis on myself. Make it a research paper. Being self-aware can be very attractive.
- Start edX courses for other subjects
- Work harder on my math
- Spend less time on PDB and MBTI?
- Japanese kanji
- Brilliant
- Take up a sport?? Swimming, Chloe Ting, Ultimate Frisbee if I'm desperate. (I came up with a wack idea - my journey through learning how to split. It would highlight my diligence.)
- Finish the CS50 course, and actually try coding for yourself. If it's too hard, then leave the computer and try writing solutions
- Write prompts at least please

Okay it's getting late, so I'll talk about the Brain and Cognitive Science department tomorrow.

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